Peace

Om
Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti
Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti
Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti
Om

Return Of The Prodigal Son

Our son is home from the hospital today, in the afternoon, so after my work finished I stopped by their home to check it out and see how things were going. My son was still in pain & fairly confined to a recliner in the living room, but it was really nice to see our granddaughter moving around the recliner keeping him entertained. Much better than the hospital setting, although that was actually pretty good too. I got to read the word & picture book that I got for my son to my granddaughter, and my son tells me she really likes the book I got, & it was fun reading together. My granddaughter often is very shy around me but after a couple minutes sitting on the sofa and reading, my daughter in law was able to get up off the sofa and leave our granddaughter alone with me without any freaking out. We read the whole book together, and she actually got a really nice big beaming smile when I would do certain animal sounds. She seems to really like animal sounds.

Tomorrow morning I am off early to get the truck in for the 60K mile service, which is a big one, so I am off to bed for now. We are greatful that our son is doing well *:-)

Ballooned & Taut Membrane, Gangrene, & Modern Medicine

Our son survived a close call today (Memorial Day) & we are grateful. A diseased condition, similar to appendicitis but infecting the gall bladder, & which is more prevalent in those of us with Native American and/or Scandinavian heritage, attacked our son suddenly late last night & his sister rushed him to the hospital at 4 a.m. today. We got a call about 8:30 a.m. telling us the hospital room number & a brief description of his condition, & that he would probably need to be operated on today. He was in a great deal of pain, & was worried. We reorganized our day and my wife & I (his mom & dad) were able to spend the entire day with him, which we believe helped out quite a bit. After more testing at the hospital, the surgeon said it was obvious that the surgery must happen immediately if he was to avoid life-threatening consequences.

Our son went into surgery about 4 p.m., came out about 6:15 p.m., spent about 45 minutes in the recovery room, then back up to the patient area so he could receive visitors and start his recovery more naturally. The photo that the surgeon showed us of the violent, swollen & gangrenous large nodule that was able to be removed was frightening in its obvious stage of near-explosion, & we offer our gratitude to our daughter for convincing her brother that he must go to hospital immediately, & then also driving him there so early in the morning.

Again, we are grateful *:-)

Granddaughter Injured In Fall, Bopa Has Questions

I just want to know one thing: Was the adult male who was part of the two-person team watching our granddaughter, drinking at the time the injury happened? I do men's counseling, and I have a little experience in observing behaviours that indicate chemical dependencies, & I need to find a careful, loving and gentle way to find out if there was beer or other alchoholic beverages being consumed by the adult male when the injury happened.

The good news: even though 7 stitches were required to repair the rip in our granddaughter's face as a result of the injury, we are told that no permanent scar will result. I hope that is true & that no further complications arise. Our best wishes go out to our granddaughter during her healing time.

Sincere & Helpful, & Begging For More

I survived my face to face meeting with the parent company's HR rep, and I believe the rep was sincere, listened, and tried hard to be honest & helpful, and I saw on the note paper that good notes were taken. What is amazing to me is that the rep insisted that it is a sincere request on the rep's part that I actively encourage other employees of Dark Nebula to make appointments with the rep, one on one, for as long a meeting as is necessary so that all that needs to be discussed can be, and so that whatever help can be offered also can be. I am confident that the rep was sincere because I also got an email saying the same thing, which means it is in writing.
Here are the questions that I asked, and here are the answers provided:
Q1. If offered a choice, which is best, a furlough or a layoff?
A1. Furlough. HR must by policy handle all furloughs and layoffs, and the local management cannot do it. I was informed that there definitely WILL be layoffs. HR would like to give all of us a layoff notice right now so that we could take advantage of the preferential rehire opportunities, but HR cannot do anything until current management defines the organization and writes the new job descriptions.

Q2. Can I count my years of military service as seniority in any way?
A2. No

Q3. What rights of transfer do I have?
A3. Any transfer would have to be at the identical grade that I am now. A conversation, informal, between me and whatever group I wanted to transfer to would need to happen at my intitiative. Both units would then need to approve the transfer, and in addition, the position must NOT have gone to HR for open recruitment.

Q4. What rights of demotion do I have?
A4. This is possible. I initiate a request, and then both departments must agree.

Q5. What rights of bumping do I have?
A5. Seniority only, and only within the current budgetary unit, and only within the same title code.

Q6. Can I get a final performance appraisal even if it isn't appraisal time?
A6. Yes, but...as it turns out, my budgetary unit has not yet chosen the appraisal form they are going to use, and so therefore I can't get one right now. It would be best to wait until June 30th so that the entire working year would be appraised. (I spoke to my boss after I got back to the office and he will try to speed up the form approval)

Q7. Will any headcount reduction description besides "layoff" be used and will any other rules apply?
A7. No, it is going to be a LAYOFF.

Q8. How is seniority calculated?
A8. Strictly by total hours WORKED over the life of the employment record. The computer totals up total hours worked from all the time cards, and that is my seniority.

Q9. What is the practice for re-employing laid off workers?
A9. There is "right to recall". There is "preferential rehire". There is "severance pay", but if severance is chosen, then all other rights are given up.

Q10. How long is the re-employment eligibility list kept active?
A10. Although it depends on seniority, the separation letter will contain every detail that needs to be known, including how long the list will be active.

Q11. If a lawyer wanted to know what the company's Involuntary Separation Plan is, how would they get it?
A11. All policies are published on the web.

Q12. If the organization as a department gets "disappeared", how does that change my entitlements?
A12. Not at all.

Some Trepidation, But Mostly Acceptance

In one hour, I will be face to face with a company human resources professional that I will be asking to help me configure a successful and easy path out of Dark Nebula to my next work experience. I have not been told I will be let go, but there are several happenings and behaviors that are informing my intuition that I am to take steps to protect my status as an employed human being:
1. The state legislature has cancelled funding for the organization I am employed by.
2. Layoffs have begun, but are being kept secret (good luck with that one).
3. Core asset reallocation planning has begun.
4. Leasing agents are bringing clients through the physical work space during the work day.
5. Management is tight-lipped, stressed, and will not communicate organizational basics.
6. Parent company departments confidentially share that "your company's planning is a mess, and nobody knows what is going to happen".
7. Parent company staff are closed and uncaring about the value our company staff could offer to the change planning process.
8. The new company mission statement sounds flimsy, meaningless, & uninspiring.
9. The infrastructure is in need of repair, but time and money are not allocated.
10. Rumor has it that the complete demise of the company is planned for September, 2008.

Oh well...onward *:-)

Steep Slopes, Fence Posts, Travelers, & Magicians

I took today as a vacation day to help get our property ready for my wife's invitational spinning & dyeing workshop that will be happening in a few weeks at our place. We live in the mountains & our property is still pretty natural, so after every spring growth there is a huge amount of work to do. Also, last year we had several very large trees taken out, & they had been sort of a bulwark against a paved road that gets substantial amounts of traffic going to & coming from work, so we were feeling a little bit exposed. The slope is pretty steep where the trees were, resulting in the effort I needed to expend today to get fence posts in place was hard on my knees, ankles & feet. Epsom salts are now improving the situation *:-) Tomorrow I will be able to finish the fence facing, & it won't be on the slope side, so it can be much easier. I ended up getting teased a bit this morning because I logged on to email for about an hour & the IT manager kept sending me emails to "say v-a-c-a-t-i-o-n, click your heels 3 times, & get out into the yard!". Well, I had to admit to her that the reason I wasn't working outside yet was because I didn't have any socks to wear *:-) I had to wash and dry some which it took a little bit of time.

Very nice DVD that our son & daughter in law recommended to us, which told stories of travelers & magicians, and we really liked it. Thank you *:-)

17-Month Old Granddaughter Finds Lost Mobile Phone, Calls Home!

Just kidding *:-) My wife lost her mobile phone today, and after thinking and worrying about it for a while, figured that she dropped it either inside our granddaughter's home, where she was watching her, or just outside the front door in the front yard area. After my wife got home where she could get to a phone, she called me and asked me to stop by our granddaughter's home after work and see if the lost mobile was there. I did stop by, and I was just about to call the lost mobile phone's number to see if I could hear the ring, when my granddaughter, being held by her very pregnant mom, got my attention and let me know that they had already found the lost mobile and I didn't need to call it. I got to goof around with my granddaughter for a while, and she remember my nick-name, which is easy for a 17-month old to say, so that was cool. She would not give me a hug however, and shook her head "no" when her mom asked her if she would give a hug *:-) No worries, I got to kiss her cheekies a bunch, and we had fun chatting about the embroidered dragons on the shirt I was wearing, which her mom said she recognized because they have a dragon statue inside the house. All in all, a worthwhile side trip for me on my way home *:-)

Dark Nebula Becoming Faint To The Eye

The search for a new leader for Dark Nebula is in full swing, and several humans are imagining themselves in the position of Director (the Big Biggies reduced the leadership title from Executive Director to Director). Some of us are using the new IM client, which has conversation recording turned off, to share our choices on whom we would or would not be comfortable with in the position of Director, assuming the choice comes from those candidates that we know about. The Super Big Biggies may just stick one of their own cronies in the slot, and that will be that, without any consideration for our preferences or for the mission of the organization.

I was able to help someone today, and at the same time, helped myself. I prepared a tutorial to help a person applying for the Director position, and it was well received. At the same time, I was able to update my tutorial, which will help keep it current.

Best of all, my wife and I were able to get together for lunch downtown today, which is a very rare occurrence. It was very pleasant, and some colleagues from my previous place of employment, both of whom I like, happened to be there and so we had a very brief catch up and "hello". Very pleasant *:-)

Dark Nebula's Spirit Begins To Leave Its Body

I have been crusading to get the IM client installed on everybody's machines, and to have the management encourage use, so that some sort of emotional intelligence can be brought into being here, so that when the body dies, some remnant of purpose can be preserved. Today, the IT manager really got behind the installation of the client for those who have been avoiding it, and it has been a lively afternoon with newbies trying it out. "This is fun!" said one newby, and that is half the purpose *:-) Our IT manager agreed to turn off the recording function of the conversations, so we can be funky in our speech and can push some boundaries so that the emotion can come through. Very cool. Great first step to healing, and of course we had to do it from the bottom up, not the other way around. Who cares if the body dies now, as long as the laughter reverberates through the corpse *:-) Have Fun *:-)

Dark Nebula Death Watch: Week 19

Art follows life, or Life follows art...who knows, who cares, & it is amazing to my wife and I that as the death spiral at my workplace deepens, it seems that the dvd selections we get online or from the local dvd outlet parallel what is happening in my workplace very closely, vignetting scenes & experiences taken directly from the daily headquarters lifelog where my cube sits quietly, sinking slowly.

It appears that the actual moment of death will be almost imperceptible, since the attendants are ignoring most of the corpus, so we may not perceive a specific moment when life leaves the organization, but it will leave. At that point, I believe the attendants will prop up the corpus, drill a hole in the skull, attempting to pour new life directly into the dead body. That won't work of course; then will follow the finger pointing and siloed isolation stages, & I don't know if I will survive that, but I do want to keep working for another 8 years, so...more will be revealed.

Difficult Starting, Nice Ending

My wife generally suffers from depression on Mother's Day, because she believes our children do not behave in the way she feels they should in honoring her. The children, imho, are very normal, & do love her, but my wife has conditions for receiving her children's love that the kids either don't know about, don't understand the need for, or just don't want to change their lives to meet her expectations. However, our youngest son overcame all of that & came to our home fairly early in the day & spent well over an hour just chatting with us & truly spending "quality" time. He has a family of his own, & does not live in the same county we do, but he made what I believe was a wonderful effort to make his mom's day special. Thank you son *:-) The other kids checked in too, & while my wife & I were away from the home for awhile, our daughter came by & left a gift, so that was cool too. Later in the day, a couple very nice, & quite lengthy, phone conversations took place with both the kids who did not get to see their mom in person. I felt it was about as good as it could be, & I am greatful. Happy Mother's Day *:-)

Wonderful Day With Wife; GPS Worked Under The Redwoods

Got home late yesterday afternoon from a 3 day business trip, & although tired, I finished the work day (just an hour or so) as a telecommuter from home & then was able to enjoy time with my wife in the evening. Today (Saturday) was a really nice day & we got to be together all day which was very nice. I had not been able to get the new GPS device that I carry around to find satellites so I could record us walking through the redwoods, & so today I started the gps long before we got to the walking spot, & since it had already found the satellites, I had no trouble uploading a nice record of our walk today, & then with google earth I was able to really get a good scenic birdeye view of where we were & how we walked the paths. Very cool *:-)

Trance Master...I'm On My Way...

Trance is knockin' me out...I use it to provide a base pace for the repetition of a sound that is very healing for me, and it is workin' me over *:-)
I even checked out DDR equipment to see if I could get my body rockin' the same way my brain is, but they are too expensive for me and I am not sure if there is a DDR unit that has Merengue music on the playlist. I'll stay open to it, because I don't want to join a dance class or club.

Hard times everywhere right now, which of course has always been the reality, but we and our children are moving into some heavier earthly duties that make it harder to stay free. We'll keep tryin'.

Happy Times

Good to see everyone in my office group today after having been out of the office for several days. Good staff meeting, then a very nice Mexican light lunch downtown, and then back to the office. Good support from the student assistants, so my load was lightened through their help, and I have almost completed the printing for the materials I need to take with me when I go on the road again.

Recycle City, Temperature Rising, Strawberry Shortcake

Today was take all recyclables to the county transfer facility day for me. Quite a bit of work, actually. Our pickup was very full, and the 3 containers with the glass in them were quite heavy, and I got my leg press and shoulder raise workout done when I had to load them into the truck, then unload them again at the transfer facility. We are very fortunate to even be allowed to use the local transfer facility, because only very local residents who can prove their address each time they go there are now allowed to use it. It is one of the nicest and most high-tech transfer facilities in the county, and many folks who live outside the area were using it before they clamped down due to excessive waste processing costs. Locals Only! We are grateful *:-)

Mid-80's temperature today, and of course that made the work I had to do to get the recyclable materials to the transfer facility very hot work, which enervated me. I went to a chain coffee shop and got an orange juice and chocolate brownie to help get me through *:-)

The biggest treat of all for me in a very long time however was when my beautiful wife gave me a bowl of her homemade strawberry shortcake as we sat down to watch a movie this evening. Perfect taste and texture, and I really appreciate it because it has been many years since I have had strawberry shortcake, and this was excellent and I loved it.

Playing In The Dirt

Excellent. I got to dig, rake, move stones, hack blackberry brambles, pile old rotten wood, plant, tamp, water, & stand back and enjoy the results of placing several new plantings just where & how my beautiful wife wants them *:-) I like this sort of work. Very therapeutic, just as English gardeners have known for hundreds of years. I'm a bit stiff, but the single aspirin I took, combined with the single glass of wine should handle it *:-) I promised the new plantings that we would love them, & they seem to be taking to their new home quite well.

I also ate properly today, which means very little. I don't know why I eat too much on most days. I feel so-o-o-o much better when I eat less than my brain tells me I need to. I shall look into that.

Home Office In The Rain & Cold

I had hoped to snag more time than I was able to today to work on our yard. I work from my home office on Fridays & between the time I get for lunch & some break time, I can usually get in some work if I am efficient about it, without negatively impacting my productivity. Today however the weather did not coincide with my schedule & so I could get only limited work done due to the wind, cold & rain. Tomorrow may be better.

I have some pain & stiffness in my hands that I don't understand, & I am working with more calcium & a little red wine [*:-)] to loosen them up. I know that I am under quite a bit of job stress right now & that may be contributing to the "uptightness" that I feel in my hands.

Onward.

Home Base On A Rainy Day

I am living with, and loving, a genius. It has been officially proclaimed on the web that my wife, a fiber artist and exceptional teacher of sewing, is a genius.
I have known this. I have said this. Now it has become publicly acknowledged via a post from a famous author in the author's blog, which is read by thousands, if not millions.
My wife is the sewing teacher of the author, and so the statement is validated by years of experience between the two.
Yea! *:-)
Congratulations, sweetie *:-)

Collateral Damage At Dark Nebula

There is a person employed here who has systematically targeted all strong leaders and claimed to the Human Resources department that the strong leaders are all "against" her. In this day and age of HR departments frozen in fear of any controversy, she has had a fairly easy time of trying to walk all over others in order to try to raise herself up over us (yes, I was one of the first strong leaders that she attacked, but she did not win). She attacks without regard for position or for the impact it might have on the organization or the overall mission, and only cares about her own mission. She needs to leave and test herself elsewhere, such as in the private sector where her competitiveness and selfishness will be met with equanimity on the part of other competitors who are the same way she is. We are not enemies, just vulnerable colleagues, and it is sad, imho, that she needs to hurt us to make herself feel better. Onward.

Dark Nebula Devolution - Brain Trance, Brain Rave, Brain Survive

The audio energy I am now using to get through my time in the office during the devolution is all trance stuff. Stuff like N-Trance "Stayin' Alive" & Nukleuz "Walk Away" & Instrumental Trance "Sandstorm". What an emotional war zone! Moments of intense love, then moments of intense hate, then moments of intense silence. Today I asked my boss to add "rails" guidance behavior to his management style, & after he understood what I was talking about, has agreed to do it. I have a good boss, but nobody in this organization has ever received real management training about what to do during devolution, which I have had, so I am helping where & when I can. I shall continue to watch my step and avoid land-mines, but there is no guarantee that an IED or well aimed spear won't injure or destroy my existence here.

AIED Sneak Attack

I was blind sided by the Acting Interim Executive Director (AIED) during my last hour of work today. I am hourly, and must work until 6 p.m. each night, so I can't just walk out the door when I feel like it without losing money. Anyway, everyone else had gone home and I was taping some network cable to the floor so nobody would trip over it, and I looked up and the AIED was standing there and so I said hello. She wanted to know how the big 5 month long project I am leading is going, and the problem with that is that she should be getting those updates from my boss. I responded that I had been keeping my boss informed and that I hoped he was telling her how things are going, and then I said that all information so far is very positive and that I believe things are going well. She made a "Well good for you" remark, and then left the area. That didn't help me. Part of the reason I don't like senior management communicating directly with lower level employees like me is that we don't speak the same language, and mis-interpretation is very easy to occur. Also, since she is the one (heaven help us) who is actually making the list of who gets laid off and who doesn't, I believe it is inappropriate for her to talk directly to someone like me about my job performance without my boss in attendance. I have enough experience to fully understand what this sort of communication is really all about, and I don't like it. I would prefer that senior management STFU and if they want to know specifics then go to my boss and get them where they will have been placed in appropriate context. End of rant *:-)

On, and On, and On, Dark Nebula Slowly Twists In The Wind

Back in the office after several days out, and it is not better, it is worse. Another promise to the full staff during a live meeting that a full disclosure of the "reorganization" will be made at the end of the month. When an HR representative who was present questioned the Acting Interim Executive Director who made the statement what month she was talking about, the Acting Interim Executive Director quickly said "Oh, yes, I didn't mean this month, I meant next month"...on & on it goes. I can see the vital energy of the organization withering on the vine before my eyes, and I can also see the tendency for siloing increasing, which I admit I am tending toward also. Excellent practice for letting go *:-)

A few minutes ago however, I did get my pay envelope, so all is not lost *:-)

Desperate Neo-Marketing Guy Rampages At Dark Nebula

When the dog's away, the fox will play. Our IT Manager was on holiday for over a week, I was out of town, and the CTO was also occupied otherwise, which allowed the pseudo-Marketing Director to get direct access to a couple of our soft-spined IT guys, who let him talk them into creating several email aliases without planning or approval. Oh well, the clients were confused anyway, so maybe they won't notice the proliferation of meaningless email addresses.

Very hard times at Dark Nebula at the moment, with no leadership, no plan, no communication, & a gradual releasing of clients due to the confusion. I only know that because I am a lower level employee, supposedly I will be given "preferential hiring" guarantees if & when the layoff comes. Great for morale, not. Que sera, sera (did I spell that right?)

I'd like to begin singing in earnest, but don't really know how to go about getting started, don't know what my voice is, don't have much time, and definitely don't have much money. Maybe it will happen anyway.

I have been fortunate so far in all my travels and all my training deliveries in remote places, and I am grateful for both those things.

Back into the office millieu tomorrow, and we shall see what we shall see. I hope my boss is going to be there. Onward.